Set Boundaries To Create Space In Your Life
Boundaries are one of my favorite things to talk about because I believe they are the foundation of a high level of self-care and self-love. Also, I am an award-winning recovered people pleaser so I constantly have to work on maintaining my boundaries for myself.
First things first, what is a boundary?
A boundary is what you are willing to allow or not allow in your energy space.
I want to start by explaining something really important that a lot of people miss.
We are all different, we have different strengths, weaknesses, likes dislikes, love languages, and different patience levels. So naturally, we will all have different boundaries. That's why it's so important for you to set them and MAINTAIN them. It’s your responsibility to do this for yourself. What you think might be an obvious boundary, might not be to someone else and vice versa.
This is why it's your job to let them know that this is a boundary...
Sometimes when we’re really stuck. We have been so out of sink with ourselves we don’t even know what we want to do with our life anymore, we don’t know what makes us happy.
This happens when we spend years of our lives taking care of everyone else, having no boundaries, and never putting ourselves first. When we do this we lose that connection with ourselves, we lose the connection to our intuition.
I have two steps I use to help make that reconnection with yourself and start to figure out what makes you happy, what makes you feel like you have a purpose when you wake up each morning.
We get so busy with our family, careers, relationships, and sometimes the care of a parent. We can easily lose track of the things we used to enjoy. It's not just the big things like hobbies and traveling. It's the little things too. A walk in nature, a quiet cup of coffee with a book. We tell ourselves we don't have time.
Before you know it, we...
I’ve recently done two series on my blog that I really loved.
-How To Find Your Life Purpose
-The Get Unstuck Series
While they both kinda help you do the same thing and can have some similarities, they both served a purpose to different people. Some felt really stuck and had a loss of purpose and some were just going through life changes and rediscovering a new purpose.
Both are extremely important and both are things I had to work through in my life.
It's important for me to help others through this process quickly so they can get on living and enjoying life.
I would consider this to be one of the great purposes in my life.
I’ve decided to combine the two series into one and for the month of December will be going over different things you can do to help yourself through this process. I'll be calling it The Live With Purpose Series.
Today, I want to share with you 3 simple ways to get you started.
I also want to add if...
What Standards Do You Use As Your Guide?
When you are doing something in your life whether it be your work, the way you eat, work out, your relationships, or the way you have fun, what do you use as a standard guide to what you do and how you do it?
For example, do you feel you have to put in a certain amount of time to earn a certain amount of money? Or, do you believe that you solve a problem or finish a job and you should get paid? A lot of people believe and a lot of corporations believe you should trade time for money but I think this just creates the opportunity for less than desirable outcomes and unhappy people.
I think we should focus on doing the best possible work in the least amount of time by being intentional with the way we do things.
How about working out? Do you ever limit yourself because you might think or society might think, you’re this old and you can’t do that, or you shouldn’t do that?
I hear this all the time about...
Get Unstuck Series - Learning Your Dreams, Passions, & Purpose
In this next episode of the “Get Unstuck Series” I thought it would be good to talk about how to dream big, and find your passions, & purpose.
What does that even mean?
Speaking from experience, when I was feeling beyond stuck. I mean, I was so freaking stuck I couldn’t even begin to know what I wanted.
I had to start reconnecting with myself. Who was I now, who was I before, what do I want, Am I even allowed to dream big?
I mean I actually used to think, why bother? I was so beaten down that I didn’t even know where to start.
So what I did was I went back. I went back to a time before I was beaten down, when I remember being happy, inspired, and excited about everything in life.
I thought to myself, I need to feel this way again.
I have to, and everyone needs to feel this way.
Don’t try to sell me the line, oh Tina grow up, not everything is fun and...
In order to get where you want to go, to reach those big goals & dreams, you need to know where you are starting. You need to acknowledge yourself, and all the successes and struggles you’ve experienced.
Just like when you're driving somewhere using a GPS, you need a starting point and then a destination in order to get to where you’re going successfully.
Your life is the same way so today we are going to talk about how we can acknowledge, celebrate, and then activate ourselves to move forward in order to get out of that stuck position.
We are going to take a fun and quick assessment to see where you might be out of balance in your life and then we will focus on how to find out what our core values are. Only after this can we start to dream big and then start to move toward those dreams.
Are you ready to get started?
Starting with the...
We all have those times in our lives when we feel stuck, stagnant, and uninspired.
You could feel a bit lost and not know how to move forward. All you do know for sure is you don’t want to stay where you’re at right now.
It could be your home situation, a relationship, your job, or your business. It can be all of the above!
I can relate to this. I think a good part of the reason this happens is that we get too busy doing instead of just being. We get busy. Bust taking care of everything for everyone.
This is definitely more common for women just because of social expectations and traditions.
Some women take care of the home, the kids, their significant other, their parents, all outside appointments, planning family gatherings, etc..
They also work full time while doing this and don’t forget we need to look a certain way, be a certain way and for crying out loud we should be grateful.
Now I’m not saying these pressures don't sometimes haunt men but...
Step 12 - Take Action
This is an important step for any goal you want to reach or solution you want to reach. Don't sit around and wait for things to become great, don't complain if you have a problem with no solution, make one, If you want something, go get it. No one is going to do these things for you. If you want something to happen, take action.
Recognize what is action and what is procrastination. Educating yourself more, preparing to take action is not action.
You’re never going to feel ready to start so you’ll have to just take the leap. That feeling in your stomach may feel like fear but it’s really excitement!
Taking action before you’re ready I believe helps you reach your goals quicker.
It kinda goes like this:
Take action, That wasn’t perfect, let me make some changes and shifts and move forward and keep trying.
So you see, you just keep learning and moving forward until you get to where you’re going!
This week for Step 11 in the Life Purpose series we will be talking about gratitude and the benefits of having a gratitude practice.
Gratitude is scientifically proven to improve relationships, physical health, psychological health, empathy, and self-esteem. It also can reduce anger.
Let's not forget that like attracts like so it's a great place to get started when you're trying to improve your energy and vibe and the outcome of anything in your life.
When you're starting to make your daily gratitude list or journal you might be thinking, what am I grateful for? Some people struggle at first to come up with things.
Remember to start small. Think of all those small things that are just so great. Your morning coffee, Your puppy or your cat, the sunrise, someone who made a kind remark to you the other day. These things make a big difference in our lives and it’s important to acknowledge them.
The more we acknowledge them the more they will show up in our lives!
It is not healthy for us as humans to stand still and to be stagnant. Remember, movement is life. It's human nature to want to learn and grow throughout our entire life and this should never stop. It is your job to feed and nourish this desire and keep your mind and imagination alive. Right now, let's focus on reigniting our desire to learn new things and have fun doing them.
I once watched a Ted Talk where the guy talked about an experiment he did where he tried something new every 30 days.
I thought, that sounds like fun, I’m going to do that!
The first thing I did was start eating plant-based cold turkey! It was an amazing experience and something I had been thinking about for a while. By the way, I’m still plant-based today and it’s been around 12 years! I also coach other people who want to transition over so give me a shout-out if this is you.
Don't worry about being good at something or looking good. Right now, just focus on moving forward, learning...