Deep Level Self Care Series: Declutter The Mind
So those of you who have worked with me know that I’m a huge fan of decluttering but not in the sense that most would think.
It’s not just about decluttering the space, but I have to say this is part of it. It goes much much bigger than this though.
Decluttering is about creating space, this reduces stress and anxiety and creates more flow in your life. Whenever and wherever you reduce clutter, you reduce friction. When you reduce friction you create flow, peace, and space to breathe.
Decluttering can be magical if you're like me and tend to do too much and get stressed and anxious easily.
It helps you identify what is important and essential in your life. The things you have to do or have and the things you really want to do and have and ditch the rest.
Can you feel the space this creates just talking about it?
That's why it feels so good when you declutter a closet, for me, It can make me feel like a new person! It automatically boosts my energy.
So yes, decluttering is magic, and after talking about boundaries last week, if you do the work from last week and this week. Bam! You’ll be so reenergized and standing in your power, that nothing will stop you. So if you didn’t get a chance to catch the boundaries blog, you can read it HERE or listen to it HERE.
As always this work is simple but not always easy.
This week I’ll be talking about decluttering the mind. Next week I’ll cover the space, and then I’ll go into your processes the week after that. Be sure you're all signed up for the blog or you can check it out on the PODCAST, or the YOUTUBE channel. This way you won’t miss the series.
So what do I mean by decluttering the mind? So I don’t go too long with this blog post because I could go on forever. I’m just going to share one exercise with you as a takeaway that you can use immediately and get results today. But before we start, why declutter the mind?
Many of us have so much on our plates in our lives and we live in a state of overwhelm most of the time. But there are some, we all know a person like this, that they always seem calm no matter what is going on in the world. This is all about protecting your energy and it starts with the mind.
As for the to-do’s, we think we have to do, the first step is to write all that stuff down, all of it, and really look at what you HAVE or WANT to do. I’m not talking about what you SHOULD do so you look good or so you don’t upset someone. What do you really have to do??? What do you really want to do??? Then you will ditch it, delegate it, and end up with a smaller DO list.
A lot of us, myself included, do a lot of things because we feel obligated or we don’t want to upset someone. Well if you’re serious about reducing stress and anxiety and avoiding burnout then you need to ditch these things. I’m not sure who wrote this quote but it says it perfectly.
Can I hear and AMEN!
Clear that list and the Do’s that are left, get them done. You should have the space for these things now that you cleared the space.
Another brain drain is any upsets you have going on in your relationships. These could be big upsets like a disagreement with a really good friend or something small like you forgot a friend's birthday and you still need to reach out but you keep forgetting! Ugh. Don’t you hate when you do those things, I do. These things weigh on your brain. They take up high-value real estate space in your brain that you could be using for much better things, like being creative and doing things you love.
What you need to remind yourself is that you can ignore these difficult situations and uncomfortable conversations but they don’t go away. They fester and grow and wear you down. You need to change the mindset to “ I know I don’t want to handle this situation but if I don’t, I will pay for it in stress and brain space.” Instead of “If I ignore this it will go away.”
We all know this isn’t true. We all know it never goes away and only gets worse. It’s about being an adult and handling your shit right away. Besides, it is ALWAYS more difficult when you let it fester for a while. Even though we all know this to be true we still procrastinate, I do too.
The difference is noticing it. Calling yourself out and then taking care of it. So as usual, the first step is being aware of your behavior and calling it out to protect your energy. It’s deep level self care!
Now the media. I’m going to make this short because I think it's obvious. What we focus on expands. So if you’re exposing yourself to nothing but negativity and things that trigger you then that's what will be reflected back at you. FEAR. Choose the TV, Movies, Social Media, News, Music, all of it, choose it with care, and create a positive space for yourself.
Also, another short one, your Should’s and Have To’s. Whenever you find yourself saying “I Should” or “I Have To” This is a red flag for something you most likely don’t want to do and you need to set a boundary, ditch, or delegate it. If it really is a part of life's contractual things that you must do then ask yourself how can I make this a better experience for myself. I’ll get into this more later in decluttering your processes.
So finally, I’m going to give you a powerful exercise that I love. This is great when you feel stressed and overwhelmed. Also, it’s great to do before bed to help you sleep better.
You might have heard of this before, it's called mind dumping. It's a journaling exercise where you're going to write out everything that's going on in your head, everything that's upsetting you, every person that's upsetting you, anything that's unsettling or making you anxious and stressed. You're taking it out of your head, and putting it onto paper. This does not have to be grammatically correct, you don't even have to be able to read it. It's all about releasing it from the stress loop inside of your brain.
The second step of this exercise is my favorite part. You have now created all of this space and you're going to fill that space with something positive. I love doing this gratitude/manifestation exercise! You're going to start by writing out something that you're grateful for in your life and how it makes you feel. Maybe write a few things you're grateful for. Then you're going to write out something that you want to bring into your life that you don't have yet but you're going to write it in the present tense as if you already have it and that you're grateful for it.
As an example, I can write that I am grateful for my dogs because they give me companionship and they always make me feel loved, this is something I already have. Then something I want to bring into my life could be a new home and I could say I am so grateful for my new home because it makes me feel safe secure and comfortable.
The best way to do this exercise is to write a few things you're grateful for and then write a few things that you're going to try to bring in and go back and forth. The way this works is your brain doesn't really know the difference between what is real and what is not. So you're bringing the energy of these things that you want in your life into that moment and your brain thinks that this is real. This helps you bring these things into your life exponentially faster.
This is a very positive way to get out of that stress and anxiety loop and that feeling of overwhelm and then bring you into a state of calm gratitude and joy. A much better way to fall asleep.
So this is a tool that you can use immediately and have immediate results from. I love tools like this because they're free and you can use them right away. This one is just fun too!
I hope you found this topic helpful and I hope you get a chance to use this tool and benefit from it. As always, I would love to hear from you, let me know if you use the tool and how it worked for you. The best place to reach out to me is on Instagram at @tinastinsoncoach
If you would like to go deeper into these deep-level self-care practices be sure to get on the wait list for my Bootcamp, registration opens in December and we start in January. I'm so excited to be doing this launch of the Bootcamp live!